and the #1 reason to use an ashtray is...........

WARNING Adult Contentwait, back up. let me start from the beginning. Yesterday Jeremy had secretly planned out an amazing date that can rival an anniversary. But he did it just cuz we needed a break from our new life here and from the kiddleywinks. So we decided on a restaurant that did not live up to its "fine dining" label. It was called Pomona Mining Co. It really did use to be a mine. We were laughing at all the decorations. They really have little overhead. It is all gravel with rusted up troughs and trailers, plus you eat out of really classy pie tins for the salad bar and drink from mason jars. plus the servers wear suspenders, jeans and flannel shirts. How is this considered "Fine Dining" when everyone dresses like Po' Folks?
After dinner i thought we were going home. Boy, was i wrong. wrong by a long shot! Jeremy turned right instead of left and i reminded him that he was going the wrong way but he said " it should just lead us back to the freeway". I scoffed. So we were bending around the hill and came upon a national park entrance and i was saying "great you have to turn back now, it didn't lead to a freeway." so he turned right again looking for a place to turn around or so i thought. then i saw a sign, "Puddingstone Hot Tub Resort". I started laughing and said "ewwww that sound like boils and blisters and all kinds of diseases waiting to happen." So Jeremy pulled in making like he was gonna turn around and then parked and stopped the car. I looked at him like "what is going on?" he just smiled that old devilish smile at me and i started laughing! He had reserved us a tub overlooking the lake. It was kinda ghetto but it was private and he balloons, cider and a teddy bear in the tub club house waiting for me. This was just a date. so we shimmied out of our clothes into swim suits that he had packed secretly and we slid into a very relaxing hot tub. so we were watching the sunset and it was so amazing and then all of a sudden, i had to go to the bathroom. there were no bathrooms anywhere and i was not about to trapse up to the lodge in heels and my swimsuit like some plus sized Miss America. atleast the sun had gone down and i was wracking my brain trying to think how i was gonna relieve myself. standing over the giant potted plant didn't work for me. so i spotted the ashtray. you can imagine what happened next. it took 4 full ashtrays to get the job done. After each cup i had to dump it into the plant pot. Jeremy was laughing the whole way through it!